:(

Well i havent blogged for awhile so i thought i would. this is a real tragic incident that has recently happened. as some of you may recall in owatonna sydney had a friend named karrisa hilstad and her mom (lisa) was my moms friend. lisa was really really nice to all of us and was happy and lively every time i saw her and we all liked her alot! after we moved we discovered that lisa was diagnosed with breast cancer. it shocked us to hear that and we stayed updated for awhile from my friend alexa whose mom helped out alot with lisa and the kids. we hadnt had much of an update for a long time. until last thursday. i was haveing a really good day after alot of weeks of bad days and i was talking with my new friend brooke who is a softball manager like me when i got a text from alexa. we usually cant text during softball so i didnt answer it right away until practice started and i replyed here is the jist of our convo.
Lexa: :(
Me: whats wrong? (she has alot of guy problems)
Lexa: you remember lisa right?
Me: hilstad?
Lexa: ya
Me: yeah i remember what happened (i kinda had an idea)
Lexa: she passed away last night (april 1, 2009)
i started tearing up a bit and brooke asked what was wrong so i told her and she was shocked. i called mom and told her about it. i was kinda in shock for most of the day cause there were alot of things going on. i went to brookes and went swimming with her but then at night i was laying in my bed thinking that her kids are gunna live the rest of their lives without their mother and karrisa who is 10 or 11 is gunna have to go through all the hard times of growing up without lisa there with her and they are going to have to live with the fact that there mom died and go through all the big moments of their lives without her there to share the memory with them and its just hard to think that shes dead and her kids will have no mom and her husband will have no wife and sence i knew her pretty well its hard to picture her dead and not there anymore.
i was talking to alexa yesterday and we were talking about how we dont think its fair that lisa who was always happy and so nice to everyone had to get breast cancer and die when she takes care of herself and the people around her. she was so full of life and yet she had to die when there are a ton of people in this world who kill themselves everyday because they want to die and dont want to be here anymore. why couldnt god have done this to one of them who wants to die and not to her who is leaving her family and friends and the rest of her life behind? i know i have my moments when i dont treat my mom well and say stuff i dont mean. its times like this when i hear about this stuff happening that i really appreciate my mom cause now travis, bria, and karrisa dont have there mother and she can never come back. i dont know what i would do without my mom nothing would ever be the same. sure they were prepared and knew this eventually was going to happen but im sure it was still a huge shock to them.